Reckless

Last week saw the death of a well known Australian writer and political commentator, Bob Ellis. I happened to be listening to the radio when an old interview of his was broadcast, and was immediately drawn in by what he was saying. He described most people as creating a large group of friends in their youth and then gradually losing them as they moved through life. He saw this as the mechanism by which we become "old" and felt that we lose something important to our sense of self by no longer having people in our lives who knew us when we were young and vulnerable and naive.

I found this fascinating, because I have recently re-connected with two old high school friends, and have been amazed at how easily we have managed to bridge the intervening decades and how comfortable we have felt in each other's company. Maybe it is our oldest friends who can not only tell us who we are but also remind us of who we were. Perhaps they provide the milestones that help us to appreciate both how far we have come and how much the journey has cost us.  And maybe they are the ones who, having seen us in our awkward, arrogant, unfinished, unpolished youth, are best placed to be forgiving of our middle-aged follies. Bob Ellis, thank you and rest in peace.

And so, to fashion. As promised last week, I am showing you another silhouette I wear frequently. It is essentially the reverse of last week:

  Slim pants +trapeze-shaped top

This is a particularly comfortable combination to wear in summer, as loose tank style tops work well.

Here is the casual version, which I wear often at home.

Top:Manning Cartell

Pants: Country Road

Necklace: Frank Ideas

Shoes:Jo Mercer

And here is the dressy, work version. Once again, you can see that the overall look is the same and the dressiness can be dialled up or down depending on the fabric and colour of the individual pieces and the footwear you team it with.

Pants:ScanlanTheodore

Top:ScanlanTheodore

Jacket:Veronika Maine

Boots:Wittner

I find this silhouette the easiest to wear in summer, because trapeze-shaped tops generally look good without a jacket or another item over the top. That means that on the really humid days, I can get away with a single layer of fabric and no sleeves and enjoy the cool. However, it is a simple look and I feel like I have to make sure the rest of my outfit is quite polished to be comfortable wearing it to work. These pants have a slight shine and the top is textured, so up close they look a bit more grown-up than the casual version. I also think wearing a heel and a jacket make most outfits more formal.

Do you still have friendships from back when you were young and reckless?

Reckless by Australian Crawl

Hot Hot Hot

I live in a city with a warm climate and one of the big advantages is that when the summer sales happen, there is still a good two months of weather that will require summer clothes. Knowing that anything I buy will get good wear in the current season, I have used the sales as a way to try out new-to-me brands and styles or silhouettes that I want to experiment with without too much of a financial commitment. I bought three items at the sales, so I will be showing you the results over the next few weeks.

Top: Manning Cartell

Necklace: Frank Ideas

Pants:Country Road

Shoes:Wittner

This top was a find from an Australian design house that I have admired, but never purchased from before. It is a linen blend and has a trapeze shape and an asymmetrical hemline that provides a dramatic train-like effect at the back. I seem to have fallen in love with tops that give me movement and drama when I am walking around!

                                                                                                Jacket:Veronika Maine

The shape of the top, the lustrous fabric and the darts at the bust line actually create the impression of volume over my chest. And I also like it worn with my cropped jacket from last summer, so I can continue to wear it even when the days are no longer quite so beautiful. I am counting this experiment as a success, and will be keeping an eye on this brand in the future.

Do you use sales as a way to dip your toe into the water of a new style or brand? 

Hot Hot Hot by Arrow

Sign Your Name

Well, I need to start with an apology for my long absence. I struggle with winter. A lot. The cold weather and grey skies seem to sap all my enthusiasm and creativity and I spend my time dreaming of summer and wishing I could hibernate. I will attempt to fight the urge to spend the next two months wrapped in a blanket in front of the TV, because I actually feel really excited and happy about my winter clothes this year.

Do you have a colour that you wear as part of most of your outfits? Along with the idea of uniforms, I have also been fascinated by the concept of a "signature colour". Angie at YouLookFab often mentions her love of bright, sour colours. Deborah at Stylish Murmurs corners the market in black and Janice at The Vivienne Files uses the idea of a signature colour in many of her capsules. My own approach has always been a bit haphazard, but planning and building a winter wardrobe has allowed me to step back a bit and realise that I love to incorporate a bit of tan into my outfits. I like the muted richness that the shade brings to the mostly neutral outfits that I wear. I love the way it plays with navy, my new favourite dark neutral base. And I enjoy the way it allows me to repeat my hair colour in my outfit.

                                                        Knit:Uniqlo
                                                        Top:ScanlonTheodore
                                                        Pants:Country Road (with Uniqlo leggings underneath!)
                                                        Boots:Wittner
                                                        Bag:Oroton
I bought this top at the beginning of winter, and have only just managed to get a picture. It is definitely a straight style, which I have mostly avoided in other tops as they feel too masculine. Surprisingly, I have found that I really enjoy the slightly boyish look this top imparts when I wear it with bottoms that have more volume. Paired with slouchy pants or an A-line skirt, the straightness of the top is offset by the curviness at the bottom, so it still feels playful and feminine. Isn't it interesting how often things come back to proportions, and how we feel in our clothes?

                                         
The bag was a birthday gift from my husband about 5 years ago, and I still love it and carry it every day. It is the perfect shade of tan. I also have a belt and a scarf in the same shade. I'm not sure if I can commit to one colour as my signature, but if I decide that I will, I think tan will be it!

 Do you have a signature colour? How did you arrive at it?

Sign Your Name by Terence Trent D'Arby

Time After Time

A few weeks ago, I was complaining about the difficulties I experienced last winter in creating a wardrobe I felt comfortable wearing. I think I may have mentioned that I have all but abandoned wearing jeans, as I felt they were too masculine now that my body is so straight. I bought several button down shirts last year, but also struggled to style them in a way that didn't feel too mannish. Well, YouLookFab came to the rescue this week, with a challenge on the forum to dress in the style of decades past. I tried 20's, 40's, 50's and 80's and to my surprise managed to style a button-down shirt in a way that felt both modern and feminine.

                                       40's and 50's style as posted on the YLF forum
I especially liked the 50's look and decided to try and recreate the silhouette in a slightly less costume-y way by taking off the scarf and swapping the kitten heels for a more contemporary shoe.

                                                          Jean:Country Road

                                                           Shirt:Anne Fontaine

                                                          Shoes:Wittner

This was my recreation of the look for a weekend at home. Despite consisting of a button-down shirt and a pair of jeans, I felt very feminine and a bit sexy! I think the combination of the unbuttoned front, the bow at the waist and the illusion of curves created by tying the shirt, completely overcomes the menswear look of the shirt and pants. The camisole gives me warmth and coverage and the  volume of the shirt hides my chest and gives me some shape! I am so excited to have discovered a way of wearing jeans that makes me feel good. It has also made me think about whether styling tweaks could make a difference to some other items in my wardrobe that I am not feeling good about wearing currently. Using the past as a style guide has been incredibly helpful and enlightening and I am enjoying having a new perspective on how to wear my clothes.

Is there any era that inspires the way you dress?

Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper

Just A Feeling

Last week, I went out (on a school night!) to see Charlie Musselwhite sing the blues. I must confess that when I go to music venues these day I am always slightly worried that I will be refused entry for being too middle-aged and uncool. Happily, my fears were unfounded. The Triffid is fairly recently opened and whilst it is definitely cool, it is also very welcoming and has a great beer garden for pre-show relaxing. It did present me with a dilemma about what to wear though, and that lead to another fashion breakthrough for me.

                                                         Camisole:Scanlon Theodore
                                                         Pants: Scanlon Theodore
                                                         Shoes:Wittner
I have two words for you: Fashion Tape! I love having bare arms and shoulders in summer and I think the strappy camisole style is especially sexy and fun for a night out. I could never wear the style before my mastectomy because of the bra issue, but I was very disappointed to find it didn't really work for me after my surgery, either. The two main issues were the risk of scar exposure from the lower, open neck and my anxiety about the appearance of my chest. Then I found this camisole, and realised that wearing something beautiful sometimes gives me as much joy as looking beautiful wearing something more flattering.

As you can see, the fashion tape completely took care of the scar exposure issue. I haven't used it before, but I have to tell you that it works great! I put a strip along the entire top edge of the camisole, and I'm pleased to report that it stayed exactly where I put it for the entire show. And I may have been dancing just a little bit. Don't tell my sons; they would be mortified!
What feelings are the most influential for you when you are choosing clothes?

Just A Feeling  Charlie Musselwhite

Firework

Happy New Year to you all! Because we are old and boring, we spent New Year's Eve watching the second series of Borgen, and got up headache-free on New Years Day to lift weights in a nearly empty gym. I was looking at my blog post from this time last year and have realised that many things have changed in the past 12 months, mostly for the better. Cancer and mastectomy place some pretty significant strains on relationships. Embodiment, self image and sexuality all take a hit in such a radical alteration of appearance and sadly, negotiating a way through that takes work and pain. Happily, it appears that my year of difficult conversations is over and I am looking forward to the joys and challenges of 2015.

                                                   Shirt and pants: Veronika Maine

                                                    Sandals: Wittner

These are pants I bought on sale at the end of winter and they are perfect for those days when it is a little too cool for shorts. I love the pleated,  80's style of the front. The shirt is boxy and cropped, one of my new favourite silhouettes and has a subtle floral self-pattern. One of the recommendations I have read for disguising a flat chest has been to wear a busily patterned top, a tall order for someone who loves neutrals and plains. I think this is an excellent compromise.

It is common at this time of year to make promises to oneself about making changes to your life. One of the suggestions on the Precision Nutrition  Facebook feed has been to choose a word to encapsulate your goals for the year, rather than a resolution that may or may not be kept. I love this idea, and have chosen the word "presence". Living in the moment and enjoying the present is something I find difficult, but probably the practice that will most enrich my life this year.  Worrying about the future and regretting the past are ultimately futile activities and I really don't have enough time to waste it on things that are neither productive nor fulfilling.What will your word for this year be?

Firework by Katy Perry

Straight Lines

Oh, internet, I love you so! Never leave me again! It is nice to be connected and back to normal once more. I was trying to decide what to show you this week, and realised that there were a few tops that I have had for several months that have not made it onto my blog yet. This one is a particular favourite of my husbands, much to my suprise, as it does not give the illusion of shape or curves at all. He tells me that he thinks it is very elegant, so I am happy to run with that.

                              Top: Cue                                                      Shorts:Country Road
                              Skirt:Carla Zampatti                                    Sandals:Wittner
                              Shoes:Wittner
This is how I have worn it over the last fortnight, both for work and casually.I especially like it with a pencil skirt, as I think it plays into the 1920's feel that works so nicely for a flat chest. I have also worn it with the pink culottes I showed you a few weeks ago.

 I have mentioned before how much I like tops with a bit of interest and detail. In this case, the detail is at the back, with a cocoon style drape. It is quite similar to my black cocoon top, but I think the thicker fabric and stricter styling makes it a bit dressier. This is certainly a situation of dressing to accentuate rather than disguise body shape, but straight lines do have a certain restraint and simplicity that are appealing in their own right. You have probably realised by now that I am neither restained nor elegant, but I love that fashion allows me to pretend that I am!

What fashion persona do you choose to project?

Straight Lines by Silverchair

I'll Change Your Mind

One of the joys and the challenges of being married is compromise. Joyful, because it gives me the opportunity to understand and accommodate another person's viewpoint and to soften some of my own sharp edges and certainties. Challenging because there is sometimes a fine line between allowing another person to influence me and sacrificing something that is central to my sense of self. Happily, one area that has been easy to compromise in has been that of clothing. I have moved to wearing neutrals over the last 12 months, but when I asked my husband what outfits he preferred, it became clear that he likes me to wear bright colours and patterns.
I mostly dress to please myself, but I do particularly enjoy it if my husband like what I am wearing.

                                                           Dress:Veronika Maine
                                                           Shoes: Wittner
This is the dress I chose this summer in an attempt to please both of us. The fabric is very soft and cool and feels lovely in the heat we have experienced recently. I also enjoy the fullness of the skirt as it feels quite feminine. The high neck works well and the loose style is one that I think is particularly suited to a flat chest. As for the colour, I have come to quite enjoy the bright and cheerful effect of the vivid colours. Putting it on feels like a little holiday after a long stretch of wearing neutrals. This has been one compromise that has been joyful and it is possible that my husband may even have changed my mind!

Do you have any styles that you have changed your mind about?

I'll Change Your Mind by Kate Miller-Heidke ( Warning!Video is not for the squeamish!)

Substitute

I didn't have an outfit to show you last week. I had minor surgery and spent the week recovering, so you would have been treated to the uninspiring vision of me in my pyjamas! However, this week I am back and feeling good. My two boys took me out for lunch for my birthday and being a proud mother, I have to show you how gorgeous they are! A good time was had by all.

This week, I wanted to show you a work-around I came up with that I felt pretty pleased with. One of the trends I have noticed in all the shops this season has been jumpsuits and playsuits. I quite like the look but unfortunately, as with dresses, there are a fairly limited number of styles that will work with a flat chest. And because playsuits are still a fairly new trend, there wasn't a huge selection and none worked for me. However, it occurred to me that I could approximate the look by choosing shorts and a top in the same colour fabric. That way, I can choose whatever top style I wanted.

Top:Cue

Shorts:Country Road

Shoes:Wittner

These were my favourite shorts last summer and the love affair continues as the weather heats up here. The overall effect of the outfit is quite blocky and straight, but I actually don't mind that in this case. I think it plays into the loose, carefree, child-like vibe of a playsuit and it is definitely comfortable and cool.

I don't wear all black very often, because it doesn't really suit my skin. However, with a fairly young style of outfit like this, the black adds a bit more sophistication than I could have achieved with a lighter colour or a print. I have tried to compensate with bright earrings and lipstick. The top is new this Spring.  I think the double layer and the pleats over the chest are quite flattering, and I love the coloured lining. I feel a bit like I've stepped out of a Dracula movie. Anyway, I was happy with how this turned out and I have decided this outfit will be my playsuit substitute.

Do you use substitutes for styles that don't work for you?

Substitute by The Who

In These Shoes?

One of the ideas that has captured my imagination over the last 12 months has been that of the capsule wardrobe. I really like the idea of having collections of items that work together, are appropriate for the activities of my life and express my style in a cohesive way. I have enjoyed reading the blog Unfancy, as I think Caroline has great style, and manages to achieve all those things with a carefully chosen seasonal wardrobe. Seeing her outfits has allowed me to realise that my heart belongs to neutrals, and I resolved to attempt to organise my own wardrobe along the lines she suggests. I find casual dressing quite difficult, and I hoped the Unfancy inspiration would help me put together some stylish weekend outfits.

Shirt:Anne Fontaine

Pants:Country Road

Shoes:Wittner

This was my first attempt. I liked the colours. I liked the silhouette. It felt easy to wear. Yet somehow it just didn't feel right. So I tried switching out the shirt for a pleated tank.

                                                              Tank: Country Road

I felt so much better wearing this, and it suddenly occurred to me that the first look was quite androgynous. Trousers and button-downs are not very feminine and it seems that I need a big dose of feminine in my outfits for them to feel like they belong to me. But what about my button-downs? One of advantages of having a flat chest is that for the first time in my adult life, I can actually wear button-downs without them gaping and looking blowsy. I really didn't want to abandon them!

Skirt: Veronika Maine

Luckily, I found that one or two feminine aspects to an outfit are enough to make me feel happy in my clothes. At last, the origin of my love of high heels becomes apparent! What parts of your style are central in making your outfits feel like "you"?

In These Shoes? by Kirsty MacColl

Father's Day

This has been a very busy weekend for me. Sunday was Father's Day and also my eldest son's 23rd birthday. I tell my husband that I am a pretty fabulous gift-giver. Not many men get a son for Father's Day! The other fun thing happening at the moment is the Brisbane Writer's Festival and on Sunday we spent the day there listening to some fascinating panel discussions and talks. I wanted to wear something comfortable and loose, but also a little dressy because we planned to go out for dinner afterwards.

                                                                 Pants and T-shirt -Veronika Maine
                                                                 Scarf-Mimco
                                                                 Shoes-Joanne Mercer
This is a little brighter than I normally wear, but I like the happy, arty vibe. These pants are from last summer. They are very soft and loose and extremely comfortable for both listening and eating! I wore a scarf across my chest which turned out to be fortuitous as the breeze was quite cool and the extra layer was welcome. I bought this short jacket this month and really like the cropped style and the warmth it provides as we slowly transition to Spring.

                                                                Jacket-Veronika Maine
After the Writer's Festival, we went out to Harajuku Gyoza for dumplings and sake, and then for ice-cream. It was lovely to have my family together. We all took turns at telling a story or fond memory about the birthday boy, much to his embarrassment, but I hope that the evening will become a fond memory for him. Here is a photo of him enjoying his birthday dinner.

How did you celebrate Father's Day?

Father's Day by Weddings, Parties, Anything

Hello again

It's hard to believe that it has been nearly 6 months since my last post. Suffice to say, I think in my haste to try and re-establish my life and reclaim the aspects that I had put on hold after my diagnosis, I may have bitten off more than I could chew! I also found that whilst physical recovery happened quite quickly, the emotional stuff takes a bit longer, especially as it invariably involves renegotiating relationships. Anyway, this semester I have taken one fewer subject at Uni, decided to try and keep work to four days a week and made a list of the things I find enjoyable and fulfilling, and promised myself to do more of those! Fashion definitely made the list and that realisation gave me the push I needed to give this blog some love.

I have heard a number of women comment that they find post-mastectomy dressing easier in winter, because they can layer. Unfortunately, that hasn't been my experience. I usually want to wear long-sleeved T-shirt styles, layered under jumpers, a combination that is fairly close-fitting. Whilst it is warm and comfortable it is not especially flattering so I was keen to find a few work-arounds for situations where I think I will feel self-conscious. Of course, wearing a scarf is always a good option but sometimes I want a simpler look.

My basic winter casual uniform. Flat and fabulous.

Top:Trenery

Jeans:Country Road

Sneakers:Sketchers

One of the my favourite items from summer was my cropped top, and I was very happy to see that the cropped trend has continued into winter (and now in the new Spring fashion hitting the store). I plan to stock up on this trend, because I can see myself wearing it even when it is not trendy anymore: it covers up my chest, it provides a bit of extra warmth over my torso and it finishes at waist level, so I have the option of emphasising my waist with a belt, or hiding it under a longer shirt layered under the crop as I have done today.

                                                       Crop top:Veronika Maine

Another style I have embraced is the drapey knit. I was not convinced about these when I first saw them in shops as I was concerned that they would be too thin to provide much warmth. However, I have actually been very comfortable when I have worn this as an outer layer, and I think the soft folds look quite arty and interesting.

                                                               Knit: Veronika Maine

And of course, if I am going to be outside, I always have the option of a coat to layer over the top. This jacket was my winter splurge. It is wool and is very warm and comfortable. It is a casual style, but I think that the straight cut and the breast pockets look good on a straighter figure. I have found this winter to be very cold. I'm not sure if it has actually been colder this year, or if it has been the effect of less insulation on my body but whatever the cause, this coat has been very welcome.

                          I feel a bit like the Fonz in this. Ehhhh. And I need a haircut!
                                                           Short coat: Cue
How do you stay warm and comfortable in winter? Are you a fan of lots of layers? See you next week!